Dog’s Best Friend
By Nora Heston Tarte
My son thinks his friends are dogs. We were at a play date the other day when Hunter joyfully decided to share, a behavior I tend to encourage, especially for an only- and non-daycare-going- child. I want him to learn how to play well with other children. The problem, however, is that when Hunter shares, he likes to shove toys right into his friends’ mouths.
This odd behavior came after Hunter got in trouble for not being gentle with his playmate, but what happened after I said the words, “be gentle” gave me serious pause. Hunter promptly looked at me, his little face registering the command, and then proceeded to pat his playmate lightly on the head before leaning in for an armless hug (Hunter putting his head on the other boy’s chest). This behavior was not received with the good intentions in which it was meant, because the petting was invasive, a little rough and slightly condescending; and the hug registered as a rather strange gesture given their was no actual hugging involved.
Hunter’s playmate quickly looked from Hunter to the adult supervisors in the room with a level of confusion and disgust that resulted in a priceless face I wish I had a picture of, and an immediate push as he tried to remove the small human from his chest. The thing is, Hunter’s behavior was supposed to be nice. He was petting his friend. And, in all fairness, this is my fault (because my husband wasn’t around to take the blame).
We have a dog and I’m a huge proponent of pets for kids. Not only have studies proven that kids with dogs tend to have stronger immune systems (probably because dogs constantly expose them to dirt and germs that otherwise wouldn’t be around), but I credit our dog with helping to teach our son to walk. After all, it was the determination to catch up to our 90-pound Black Mouth Cur that motivated Hunter to take his first steps. In addition to walking, our dog has also taught Hunter how to play with others.
The command “be gentle” most commonly comes in response to Hunter using our dog as a drum, horse or step stool. So, when I made the warning, he jumped into action, responding exactly how he would to our dog with a series of nice pets and an animal-appropriate hug.
I can’t help but marvel at how children view the world. In a way, his immediate reaction shows an impressive amount of acceptance and tolerance as well as the true innocence of a child. He doesn’t see an animal as lesser than another human being – to him, he was treating his playmate with the same respect and love he shows his brother. To Hunter, that was the utmost compliment (or perhaps it was a knee-jerk reaction to my command, but let’s pretend it’s not). Either way, PETA could learn a thing or two from him.
My takeaway is simple: we need more human play dates.
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